Assistant Quantity Surveyor
Posted 19 hours ago
- Four Houses Corner, Berkshire
- Permanent
- £35,000 to £45,000 /Yr
- Sponsored
- Expires In a month
Assistant Quantity Surveyor - The human calculator who can smell an overspend from 100 yards.
Location:
·Aldermaston/Tadley (with site visits-where your pristine spreadsheets are introduced to reality, like a luxury yacht docking at a car boot sale)
Department:
·Strategic Works Division (think MI5, but with more invoices and less espionage)
About the company:
·A contractor that builds things meant to stay upright, on budget, and far away from the 10 o'clock news. They specialise in MOD fit-outs-projects so secretive, even the bricks have NDAs. They're after a Quantity Surveyor/Estimator who can wrestle numbers into submission, spot risks faster than a politician spots a camera, and navigate contracts with the grace of a ballerina in steel-toe boots.
The Role:
·You'll be the Sherlock Holmes of spreadsheets, the Attenborough of analytics, and the Gandalf of getting contracts to actually make sense (minus the beard, unless that's your thing). Mostly office-based, with the occasional site visit to breathe in the sweet aroma of wet cement and regret.
What They're Looking For:
·Experience: 5+ years of herding budgets and making numbers behave. NEC contract knowledge? Lovely. If not, Google is free.
·Excel Wizardry: If your spreadsheets were novels, they'd be War and Peace.
·Cost Control: You can sniff out overspend faster than a bloodhound on Red Bull.
·Contract Whisperer: NEC, JCT-if you can read a contract without swearing (much), you're ahead of half the industry.
·Risk Radar: You spot risks quicker than HR spots a dodgy expense claim.
·Communication Ninja: Charm clients, terrify subcontractors, and send emails that actually make sense.
·Organisational Jedi: Your calendar is basically Fort Knox.
·Negotiation Pro: You'll squeeze better prices out of suppliers than your nan squeezes teabags-and she steeps them for a week.
Qualifications:
·Bachelor's in Quantity Surveying or equivalent. Sheer stubbornness and a thousand-yard stare from budget meetings are also acceptable.
Professional certifications?
·Lovely if you've got them. If not, we won't call the authorities.
Security Clearance:
·Must be a British passport holder with 10 years of UK residency. Basically, if MI5 wouldn't bat an eyelid at your search history, you're good to go.
Full-Time Commitment:
·Office-based with site visits - Monday to Friday, 8 AM to 5 PM. None of this digital nomad from Bali nonsense.
I know this ad's had a bit of fun, but let's be clear-I'm a serious recruiter working with a serious contractor, and this is a seriously good opportunity. If you've got the experience and the grit to handle projects that matter, I want to hear from you.
Give me (Spencer Wade) a call on (phone number removed) or drop me an email at (url removed)
Location:
·Aldermaston/Tadley (with site visits-where your pristine spreadsheets are introduced to reality, like a luxury yacht docking at a car boot sale)
Department:
·Strategic Works Division (think MI5, but with more invoices and less espionage)
About the company:
·A contractor that builds things meant to stay upright, on budget, and far away from the 10 o'clock news. They specialise in MOD fit-outs-projects so secretive, even the bricks have NDAs. They're after a Quantity Surveyor/Estimator who can wrestle numbers into submission, spot risks faster than a politician spots a camera, and navigate contracts with the grace of a ballerina in steel-toe boots.
The Role:
·You'll be the Sherlock Holmes of spreadsheets, the Attenborough of analytics, and the Gandalf of getting contracts to actually make sense (minus the beard, unless that's your thing). Mostly office-based, with the occasional site visit to breathe in the sweet aroma of wet cement and regret.
What They're Looking For:
·Experience: 5+ years of herding budgets and making numbers behave. NEC contract knowledge? Lovely. If not, Google is free.
·Excel Wizardry: If your spreadsheets were novels, they'd be War and Peace.
·Cost Control: You can sniff out overspend faster than a bloodhound on Red Bull.
·Contract Whisperer: NEC, JCT-if you can read a contract without swearing (much), you're ahead of half the industry.
·Risk Radar: You spot risks quicker than HR spots a dodgy expense claim.
·Communication Ninja: Charm clients, terrify subcontractors, and send emails that actually make sense.
·Organisational Jedi: Your calendar is basically Fort Knox.
·Negotiation Pro: You'll squeeze better prices out of suppliers than your nan squeezes teabags-and she steeps them for a week.
Qualifications:
·Bachelor's in Quantity Surveying or equivalent. Sheer stubbornness and a thousand-yard stare from budget meetings are also acceptable.
Professional certifications?
·Lovely if you've got them. If not, we won't call the authorities.
Security Clearance:
·Must be a British passport holder with 10 years of UK residency. Basically, if MI5 wouldn't bat an eyelid at your search history, you're good to go.
Full-Time Commitment:
·Office-based with site visits - Monday to Friday, 8 AM to 5 PM. None of this digital nomad from Bali nonsense.
I know this ad's had a bit of fun, but let's be clear-I'm a serious recruiter working with a serious contractor, and this is a seriously good opportunity. If you've got the experience and the grit to handle projects that matter, I want to hear from you.
Give me (Spencer Wade) a call on (phone number removed) or drop me an email at (url removed)